Five Things to Remember After A Harsh Or Unfair Critique

Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people. Colossians 3:23 NLT

As a child, I had a large support group that encouraged me in my dream of becoming an author. As I grew older, I lost touch with many of them and started looking elsewhere for others to fill the void. I found a group and showed them my writing. But one of those people told me my stories were terrible unless I followed all of their suggestions. I didn’t want to follow most of those suggestions because they would have changed my story into something I didn’t want it to be.

As this continued, I pulled back and stopped sharing my writing projects when this group met. This led to me not showing much of my writing to anyone, even with people who had been supportive in the past. But my dream of being an author still niggled at the back of my mind, prompting me to write.

In the fall of 2022, I began working on a fantasy book series for kids, but I didn’t share anything about this new project with anyone. Then a new development in the story gave me courage to share it with the person who is now my editor. Our friendship and relationship as editor to writer took off, as did the editing process. 

If I had remained in my fear and pain, this relationship and forward motion of my book wouldn’t have happened. If you struggle with harsh critiques of your work as I did, here are five things to remember: 

1. An unfair critique does not decide your future. God is the one who has mapped out your life. If He called you to write, then write, without worrying about what others will say. He’s the one you’re writing for and His Word is far more important and trustworthy than that of man.

2. Your story is not your identity, and while it’s important to do your best at everything–including writing–you are not to make your story your god. This is something I struggle with a lot. I pour my heart into my work. Then when people attack it, it’s like they’re attacking the very core of who I am. But that’s because I’ve been turning these stories into my identity. It’s important to remember that your identity is found in Christ. Even if your status as “writer” is taken away, you can still know you are a forgiven child of God. This is the only identity that really matters and one no one can take away from you.

3. No matter what, the purpose of your story is not to please others; it is first and foremost to honor the Lord. And only after you set about to do that can you write with the motivation to bring the light of Jesus to others who read what you write.

4. While negative words may hurt, you can choose to let them fester, or you can ask God to make them into fertilizer. These words can drive you to seek comfort in the Lord or show you that you are stronger than those words. Satan will bring the memory of an unfair critique back to you in an attempt to stop you from fulfilling God’s purpose for you. You decide how to respond.

5. Even if no one you know likes your story, there will be someone who will! My parents told me a story several years ago of a musician who endured a rude criticism of his music. When asked what defense he offered, he said that people still came to his concerts, and that was his best defense. 

Unfair critiques can hurt. But if you focus on the right things rather than the negativity, if you write to please God and bless others, you can turn that pain into prayers and God will mature your faith. 

So dust off your shoulders, lift up a prayer, and start writing.